The Canadian boondoggle smartphone app ArriveCan has been gobbled up by Elon Musk, in his ongoing quest to acquire world domination. The 60 million dollar project, slammed recently by Canada’s auditor general for its huge cost overruns, will be “magically transformed using the same success winning formulas we used for X” says Musk in a new tweet (or x) after the billionaire announced the acquisition. The platform is due to be renamed Y (as in “Y come back to Canada”), and will sell $8 blue check marks as validation stamps that the user is exactly who they claim to impersonate. Musk added that “they can even be used to expedite customs screening on Mars when Canada establishes its first slum on the red planet.” Tesla owners will get the app automatically added to their hands-free driving option, to make the cars swerve and speed up through yellow traffic lights just like looney Canadian drivers.
Attempts to contact the prime minister’s office for comments on this latest development have been unsuccessful as of press time, likely because Trudeau is still being stripped searched by airport customs looking for illicit brains.
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